[ oh my god don't refer to it that way that's... weird. as if he's being judged for his choice in friends, though obviously that's not the case here. ]
What do you mean my "tastes"? There's nothing wrong with them. [ he crosses his arms, tries his best not to make a face. ] Just... having a bond sounds like... like someone asking for marriage.
[ everyone he knows who has a bond is in a relationship somehow. ]
[ he shuffles his feet before he sits down on the floor, tries to breathe. being jittery on top of being an arrogant young master doesn't help him at all. ]
I hate this. I'll... I'll try. I just don't know what to say. Or how to go about it. Or...
[ he's never really talked to this extent with his parents yet, haven't opened up, and he doesn't like that it had to be frustration that kicked him into it. ]
[ A-ah. This conversation is obviously making Jin Ling uncomfortable. Maybe he should take a step back.
Physically, he steps forward instead, coming to kneel by his son, a tentative hand reaching out to land in his shoulder. ]
If there's any way I can help...
[ Though, now that he says it out loud... Wouldn't having your father help you find a bond partner be just as embarrassing, if not more so, than asking yourself? ]
[ he looks up, opens and closes his mouth wordlessly for a couple of moments. the longer he does spend time with his parents, the more tangled up his emotions get, but it's not... bad. and again, asking for help is literally the thing he's the worst at.
but getting help from his father isn't so bad, is it? even if they clash more times than not. and even if his father is kind of embarrassing too. so his cheeks burn a little, and he looks down to his hands in his lap. ]
[ His hand lingers on Jin Ling's shoulder for a moment longer, before he withdraws it with a flourish of his sleeve, settling it instead into the much more comfortable position behind his back. He frowns, the corners of his mouth tugging downward in contemplation. Taking a decisive breath through his nose and then releasing it, he looks Jin Ling in the eye once more. ]
Surely some embarrassment is preferable over losing control of your faculties?
[ He doesn't like the phrase, "going feral." This world may be content to label them as monsters and strip any negative connotations to the word, but Jin Zixuan would prefer to keep hold of his humanity in whatever small ways he can. His humanity, and that of his son. Even though he can still sharply remember holding A-Ling's shaking, terrified canine form to his chest. ]
I understand that it is difficult for you to reach out to others, but I need you to try, A-Ling. For my sake, if not for your own.
[ he won't admit that the hand on his shoulder is comforting, so he doesn't protest when his father pulls away. somehow, he's still not used to all the physical touch from people, even if it started with his dajiu, who seems to have no reservations when it comes to people he treasures. ]
...I know that. [ it's mumbled, but he knows it's true. he doesn't want to go feral, doesn't want to lose his free will. it's just difficult to face the fact that it's a possibility. he doesn't want to ask his mother, when she already has two bonds, so he'll just have to suck it up and ask publicly, right? ]
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branchandroot
no subject
Date: 2020-10-31 02:32 am (UTC)What do you mean my "tastes"? There's nothing wrong with them. [ he crosses his arms, tries his best not to make a face. ] Just... having a bond sounds like... like someone asking for marriage.
[ everyone he knows who has a bond is in a relationship somehow. ]
no subject
Date: 2020-10-31 02:34 am (UTC)Best not to belabor the point. ]
Not all bonds have to be romantic in nature. Your mother is bonded with Jiang-zhongzhu.
no subject
Date: 2020-10-31 02:38 am (UTC)[ he shuffles his feet before he sits down on the floor, tries to breathe. being jittery on top of being an arrogant young master doesn't help him at all. ]
I hate this. I'll... I'll try. I just don't know what to say. Or how to go about it. Or...
[ he's never really talked to this extent with his parents yet, haven't opened up, and he doesn't like that it had to be frustration that kicked him into it. ]
no subject
Date: 2020-10-31 02:48 am (UTC)Physically, he steps forward instead, coming to kneel by his son, a tentative hand reaching out to land in his shoulder. ]
If there's any way I can help...
[ Though, now that he says it out loud... Wouldn't having your father help you find a bond partner be just as embarrassing, if not more so, than asking yourself? ]
no subject
Date: 2020-10-31 01:02 pm (UTC)but getting help from his father isn't so bad, is it? even if they clash more times than not. and even if his father is kind of embarrassing too. so his cheeks burn a little, and he looks down to his hands in his lap. ]
I... I don't know. It's embarrassing.
no subject
Date: 2020-11-07 01:24 am (UTC)Surely some embarrassment is preferable over losing control of your faculties?
[ He doesn't like the phrase, "going feral." This world may be content to label them as monsters and strip any negative connotations to the word, but Jin Zixuan would prefer to keep hold of his humanity in whatever small ways he can. His humanity, and that of his son. Even though he can still sharply remember holding A-Ling's shaking, terrified canine form to his chest. ]
I understand that it is difficult for you to reach out to others, but I need you to try, A-Ling. For my sake, if not for your own.
no subject
Date: 2020-12-24 02:48 pm (UTC)...I know that. [ it's mumbled, but he knows it's true. he doesn't want to go feral, doesn't want to lose his free will. it's just difficult to face the fact that it's a possibility. he doesn't want to ask his mother, when she already has two bonds, so he'll just have to suck it up and ask publicly, right? ]
I'll try.